Elections 2010: California Experiences “High Voter Turnout”

Proposition 19 Triggers Spike in Voter Registration among Liberal Pothead Demographic

California boasts an illustrious political history that few states can match.  Over the past 50 years, the Golden State has given us presidents Richard Nixon and Ronald Reagan, and more recently, has provided us with other iconic public figures with equally impressive track records such as Arnold Schwarzenegger and Nancy Pelosi.
Image of Prop 19 Banner
Perhaps even more notorious than the politicians spawned from California are the ubiquitous, controversial propositions that appear on ballots during each election cycle.  In addition to potentially altering legislation, these hot-button issues serve mainly to anger and divide citizens of the state, as well as the rest of us across the U.S. who must rely on our elected officials to overturn our civil and Constitutional rights rather than do so by our own hand.

Two years ago, Proposition 8—the infamous bill to ban marriage between homosexuals—took center stage in California and garnered the attention of the entire nation.  The costly campaign to drive voters to the polls and support the measure drew enormous amounts of external funding, much of it coming from the religious right who reside beyond state lines.  As a result, California became a moral and political battleground for American politics.

We all know what happened.  Droves of frenzied citizens flocked to voting booths to exercise their unfounded authority to deny alternative segments of fellow Californians the right to legally marry each other.  On the other side of the spectrum, people turned out in record numbers to vote against the proposition only to be ultimately outnumbered by selfish heterosexuals who wish to reserve the legal right to marry–and subsequently cheat, divorce, and sue–as a sacred privilege to be shared only between a man and a woman.

This year, California ballots will feature a much different issue to be put up for public vote: Proposition 19—the move to legalize marijuana.  While the outcome remains to be seen, one thing is imminent: high voter turnout.  Pun intended.
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Satanic Witchcraft vs. Marxism: Elections 2010

Delaware Senate race to showcase epic battle between good and evil

In case you haven’t noticed, the never-ending cycle of campaign politics is rearing its ugly head yet again in our beloved United States of America.  Much like the previous decade of dualistic political struggle, it is another exercise in snake oil sales and soothsaying—a tired act that only masks the candidates’ true intentions as they jockey for position to wrap their bloated sausage fingers around the withering teat of our nation’s cash flow.  A flow, mind you, comprised of hundreds of billions of dollars in payday loans from our friends in communist China.

The race for one of Delaware’s seats in the U.S. Senate promises to offer a close-up look at the universal struggle between Good and Evil, or Republicans (or a Tea Partier who is really a Republican in disguise) vs. Democrats.  However, the roles are completely redefined in this latest clash, where the Great Satan is now manifest in a Republican form, but faces an evil even greater than Lucifer himself—a Marxist.

Photo of Satan and Karl Marx

Satan (left) and Karl Marx (right) square off in a battle of who is the greater evil. According to Fox News reports, Marx and his proponents have just taken over the universe's No. 1 rank of Supreme Being of Evil from Satan.

Before we get to the Main Event, let’s take a look at the Tale of the Tape. Continue reading